Saturday night

Last night was spent with Paul. Actually, we didn't part ways until after five this morning. Until quite recently, I referred to him as "boring Paul". I felt that way primarily because we seem to not have common interests. He's very active and I'm not. He's relatively easy going and I'm not :). He's got a brilliant mind. He's got a BS in Mathematics and I've got the aptitude of a three year old when it comes to numbers.

I've spent time with him once before. It was quite relaxing. The evening was spent watching television, (my favorite thing to do these days) , and talking until four in the morning. We gave each other massages, (nothing sexual), and didn't even kiss. It was all great for me because I felt no pressure to be anyone other than myself and to enjoy the feeling of exchanging thoughts and ideas with someone else without artifice.

I could tell that he was attracted to me, thus I felt no compulsion to do anything with him. I know, it makes little sense, but, I felt that I'd won the battle. He's reasonably attractive, with that in mind, I knew that if the opportunity presented itself I wouldn't pass. However, I wasn't about to initiate any sort of intimacy.

Last night he kissed me. It was quite a surprise. I've been kissed before and it never quite affected me in the same way. I was pleasantly surprised to find that he's got quite a bit of passion. I never expected so much from a person who seems so even temepered as himself. Call me naive, and it wouldn't necessarily be that far off. I've had little experience with men and even less when it comes to normal and positive experiences. This was different from anything that I'd experienced before.

I wasn't knocked off my feet. Every thought didn't fly out of my mind. I did enjoy it immensely. I found myself wondering as I was locked in his surprisingly strong embrace whether or not this lack of overwhelming emotion was a sign of something so much better than anything I've experienced before.

He is a careful and precise person who believes in handling things in a logical manner. He respects me enough to not try and scew my brains out the first time that he sees me. I am attracted to his mind and the way that he thinks . He's reasonably attractive and I don't see happening with him what happened with Andy. He's got goals and has accomplished much for his age and I admire that. I don't know where my head is at but I'm happy when I'm with him. Not ecstatic...just happy. That's a good thing. I'm tired of the major ups and downs of the game of love...it's time for something simple and sweet.